Assalamualaikum creatures. Greetings.
Dah lama tak blogging. I was too busy with works, family and holiday. Plus, I don't have any important things to blog. I know. For some people, blog is the place where they keep posting about anything, including craps. Itu orang yang tak ada kerja namanya. Usually, students do that. Trust me, I was one of them too. :p
Lately, there's a lot of musibah datang. I was quite thankful actually. At least, it helps me to be stronger than before. Aku banyak bersabar, banyak menangis. Dan setiap kali mengadu pada Dia, aku rasa lega. Segala musibah sikit demi sikit beransur pulih. Alhamdulillah. Ujian yang Dia beri sangat hebat. Aku rasa lebih dewasa. Aku rasa lebih matang.
I learnt lots of things from what had happened. For me, people are the same. Like wise man said, nobody is perfect. Since that day, aku banyak berdiam diri. But, I am actually observing people. Banyak sangat ragam. Ada yang baik, ada yang kurang baik. Bagi aku, not everything yang kita buat, either good or bad have to tell others about it. Cukuplah Dia saja yang tahu. Kalau kau tak menunjuk pun, He knows everything. Dia Maha Melihat, Maha Mendengar dan Maha Mengetahui. Why bother? Bukannya people yang bagi kau kredit, why must we please them instead of Allah sendiri? Sadly, it is hard to satisfy people than Allah. Padahal, kita dan dia sama saja. Human. People. Creatures of Allah. Why we try so hard to make them happy or puji kita? No point.
But, that is what almost all people want. Menunjuk. Memuji. Bangga. Riak. Sombong. We forget. We forget that semua yang datang tu datang daripada Allah. Mungkin, yes, apa yang kita buat tu kita buat dengan niat yang baik dan ikhlas. Tapi kadang-kadang, we overreact. Itu yang timbul fitnah dan pergaduhan di kalangan orang sekeliling.
Entahlah. Once, I gave up with life. But when I think of Him, I grow stronger. The formula is, sentiasa ingat mati. Hidup ni sementara. Walau kita kejar fame and glory, tapi yang buat kita bahagia di sana adalah amalan kebaikan. Amar ma'ruf, nahi mungkar.
For now, the only thing that I think about is to wear purdah or niqab. People keep misunderstanding with my face. Muka masam, sombong and whatsoever. Walaupun I was emotionless at that time, doing my own work. It was hard. Trust me. I don't blame the face that Allah gives to me. I only think when wearing purdah can avoid those fitnah dan pergaduhan. Almost everyday, I cry. And almost everyday, I fake. I fake to avoid people from talking bad about my face. I feel like I wear a smiley mask. Like Joker; crack smile every minute. It kills me. But I know, wearing purdah is not an easy task. I have to study about it, asking people around. I also have to think of my work, how people around me react. It is very tough actually.
No, my blog is not about ceramah agama or what. Terus-terang, ilmu agama aku sangat cetek. Aku jahil bab agama walaupun aku bertudung, aku solat dan aku puasa. Banyak benda yang aku tak tahu. Alhamdulillah, dalam conversation dan observation sehari-hari, banyak hidayah yang aku dapat. Everyone tahu kita perlu pakai tudung hingga tutup dada. I knew it dah lama. Tapi, hidayah tu datang dengan tiba-tiba. I have a friend yang memang dari dulu tudung dia labuh. But at one fine day, hati aku tergerak untuk pakai tudung labuh. See? Aku dapat pahala, dia pula dapat lebih besar pahala dari aku.
My other friend pula sangat jaga waktu solat. Everytime dengar azan, she will leave all the things that she is doing at that time and pergi solat. Dan, everyone knew that kita kena jaga solat. Benda tu datang tanpa kita minta, tanpa kita sedar. Jadi, sentiasalah doa agar hati kita terbuka untuk terima hidayah yang datang. Insya-Allah. Amin.
Bye creatures. Assalamualaikum. :)
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